Twenty-Ninth Sunday In Ordinary Time. Premier League Week 29 Review.

The Foreign Secretary this week demonstrated his nous for such an integral role in the British government by waving away concerns over the impact of Brexit on the Irish border by plucking the nonsensical comparison of London boroughs out of the air. “There is no border between Islington, Camden and Westminster. There is no border between Camden and […]

Down For The Twenty-Fifth Time. Premier League Week 25 Review.

The transfer window circus came to a close on Wednesday night, with Arsenal, Chelsea and Borussia Dortmund partaking in the most extravagant three-way since Elton John, David Furnish and [Redacted] proved they were very much Ready For Love. Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang arrived in North London having spent the last month telling the Dortmund bosses they weren’t […]

Twenty First Century Digital Boy. Premier League Week 21 Review.

As the book closes on another dreadful year, we’ve a chance to reflect on everything that has gone on around the world in the past twelve months and wonder ‘can it really get any worse?’. From Donald Trump’s inauguration, to seemingly endless terror attacks, from the Manchester bombing to Grenfell Tower and natural disasters across […]

Eleventh! Premier League Week 11 Review.

Not content with groping hopefully through Brexit negotiations in an attempt to secure some semblance of a future for the United Kingdom, it has transpired this week that several notable MPs have been groping hopefully in the past too. Revelations that thirty-six Conservatives have been accused of ‘lurid behaviour’, including six cabinet ministers, come as […]

Seventh Son of a Seventh Son. Premier League Week 7 Review.

As the world burns its comforting to know that, for ten months a year at least, football provides a weekly distraction. Sure, the leader of the free-world is a complete maniac that spent this weekend trying to cover his arse after failing to provide an adequate response to the hurricane crisis in Puerto Rico. Yes, […]

Here’s To The Fourth Time! Premier League Week 4 Review.

There’s nothing quite like coming back from a holiday. Opening the door and being greeted by the familiar smell of home, sorting through the post after you’ve put the kettle on to make a brew, settling down into the grooves of your favourite armchair, flicking through the papers to see that, yes, the world is […]

The Second Coming. Premier League Week Two Review

Just as on the first day of Britsh summer - when you go out and buy yourself a barbecue, cut the grass, put up the nationalistic bunting, fill your fridge with meat and beer, blast out your favourite obnoxious music, stick on your £2 Ray-Bon sunglasses, and start ringing round all your mates to get […]